Friday, April 10, 2009

Top Ten Reasons Why I Can't Participate in Gym Class

Since its Friday and I'm in a great mood, lets have a little fun. I'm thinking this will be a work in progress for the rest of my career but really...there are some beauties that I just have to share. Kids can be so creative when the need strikes and for some, getting out of gym class is a life-long venture.

Being of the female gender I feel it is only right that I be allowed to poke fun at some of our hysterical and hystrionic ways. Thus only the excuses I get from the girls are included in this post. The boys are a whole different ball of wax...come to think of it I think there was actually one excuse about wax from a boy...I'll save that for another day.

Please note, many of these excuses were given with a high-pitched, screeching sort of voice similar to that of a bird of prey as it swoops down upon its quarry. Therefore intense capitalization and extra punctuation is necessary to properly convey the tone.
Many of these girls should have gotten credit for all of the foot stomping done while screeching.


How can I run around today!!! My shirt doesn't match my shorts!!!!


What do you mean we are going outside??!! The sun is shining!!!!! AAHHHHH!!!


I just can't. Not today.


I just had a test in math and my fingers hurt.


Can someone else do this for me? (in reference to running)


Do we actually have to move in this class? I don't think I can.


If I have to change my skirt then I'm not playing. (Note: skirt was barely a mini)


My mom said that I'm not normal so I shouldn't run around today.


But I have cramps. You have no idea how that feels.


Umm...ahhh....ummm....Ms. Mincone? I can't participate in gym today because...I....ahhh....stapled my bum.

I have absolutely no idea how one goes about stapling their bum and to this day, I still do not know. I did not ask how or why. I simply inquired if the staple was still lodged in flesh and if bleeding was currently underway. The answer to both was no so the child was instructed to get changed and start participating.

So as you sit at your desk or on the couch reading this post, please try to think of a better excuse as to why you aren't up and moving around.

Now get up and get moving!!!

I don't want to hear it!!!!!

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